4 Things I missed when I was pregnant

When I found out I was pregnant, the one thing I thought I’d miss the most was being able to drink. I was only four weeks when the test came up positive, and had a holiday to Barcelona booked a couple of weeks later – and I’m not going to lie to you, whilst I was made up I was pregnant, I was absolutely gutted that jug after jug of Sangria on the beach was cruelly snatched off the menu. Then, the thought of a sober Christmas? Fucking hell, how was I going to cope? Turns out, swerving the ale for 9 months wasn’t that bad – but there were plenty of other normal things you’d usually take for granted that I really missed when I was pregnant:

Good sex

I’m going to jump straight in at the deep end and tell you that sex when you’re pregnant is awkward AF. Whilst you CAN have sex safely right up until your waters break, whether you WANT to is a whole different kettle of fish. Every woman is different, but for me, as soon as I started getting bigger in the second trimester I just didn’t feel sexy. That’s not to say I didn’t want to have sex, but it’s so much harder to enjoy yourself when you feel self conscious about how you look. By 32 weeks I was enormous, and every position seemed to crush the bump somehow – all except on the side, which I think we can all agree isn’t exactly the hottest thing in the world.

Sleeping the night through

It wasn’t long ago I’d be limiting myself to two glasses of wine of a Thursday evening so I wouldn’t be hungover in work the next day, but when I was pregnant I’d have to limit myself to no more than a sip of water post 10.30pm in the hope that it’d mean that I’d only have to get up for one wee in the night. How times change.

Seriously though, there are a million different things that keep pregnant women from a hot date with a good night’s sleep; backache, hip pain, anxiety, having to get up for 3, maybe 5 wees – the list goes on. People tell you that you’ll be sleep deprived when the baby arrives, but you have plenty of time to get used to it.

Clothes shopping

Before you’re pregnant, you believe all of the myths and legends about cute maternity clothes – but, honestly, the maternity section is where style goes to die. Not that it really matters; by the third trimester you’re more bothered about function over fashion, and comfort becomes the main factor when buying anything. Stripey slogan tees and corrective shoes? Oh, sign me up. But you don’t half miss being able to buy cute outfits!

Being independent

I ended up being induced at 38 weeks because I was so enormous they thought I was going to give birth to the jolly green giant. I was a big massive ball of a human and I felt like Humpty Dumpty – I couldn’t even reach my feet to put my own socks on. I was forever having to ask people to pick things up for me, or help me tie my shoes.

But even though it felt like the longest nine months, now it’s over I can tell you all the cliche is true; it’s all worth it in the end.