5 things to do instead of texting fuckboys back

Fuckboys; the elusive creature that walk freely among us. They build us up, only to tear us down the very next day. You know the cycle; he suggests plans, you mentally plan your outfit, maybe even shave your legs ready… and then nothing comes of it. And you don’t hear from him again until next time he’s horny.

These guys aren’t good for us. You know that, I know that, we all KNOW that, but it doesn’t stop us crawling back to them every time they care to grace our whatsapp with their presence. But the fact of the matter is, if he hasn’t got in touch for a few days then it’s highly unlikely that he’s lost his phone/been hit by a bus/been building a school in Africa. In actual fact he’s just not that bothered, and probably has you, and 6 other girls, on rotation.

So, it’s time to break the cycle – and it starts with IGNORING HIS MESSAGES. I mean it. Blue tick that bastard and leave him on read.

It’s harder than it sounds, I know. Abstaining from texting back is a serious business, that requires skill and determination. So, to help you out a bit, here are five things you can do instead of texting that fuckboy back.

Ignore these fuckboys and get your nails did

We don’t just mean a quick coat of red before rushing out; book a proper appointment and treat yourself to the most arrogantly, glittered-to-death claws you’ve ever had. Not only will a fresh set make you feel ready to take on the world, but your nail technician will give you enough snarls to make sure you don’t touch that phone for at least an hour and a half.

Go to the gym

You’ve already lost 12 stone of unworthy man from your life, so why not but a graft in to lose those last few pounds. Plus exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people don’t text fuckboys back.

Have a bath

A proper bath, you know the type – where you make a real event of it. Prop your laptop on the toilet seat and binge-watch Netflix. Shave your legs. Then, when you get out, body brush and moisturise every inch of your body. After all, who needs a man when you’re a silky mermaid goddess?

Go through your wardrobe

There’s nothing better for the soul than going through your wardrobe and binning/donating anything that doesn’t make you look a strong 8/10 in the right lighting.

Ring your best mate

Last but not least, if you can’t quite remember why you’re swerving him –  give your best mate a ring. She will kindly remind you of every single thing he ever did wrong to you, to fashion and to humanity.

Stay strong, you got this!